It’s with great pleasure and coffers agape that we announce the recommencement of operations here at the OGFWBTSMBKP! After many months of court-ordered silence, our legal department has successfully overturned the injunction filed against us last February, meaning we can once again throw open our doors, our hearts and your wallets, and celebrate the liver-shriveling hedonism and unchecked self-righteousness that comes from supporting a charitable cause!
It has been a long and arduous battle with the Chinese judicial system in order to keep our charity alive, and needless to say, there was some…litigious ugliness required of us to beat this injunction. If you’d like all the details, please reference the entry Regarding Norbu to get all the sorted details.
But for those of you on a tight schedule, here’s the gist without the how or why: In accordance with the court’s ruling, beloved aid recipient Norbu Samdhup will be indefinitely detained in a Chinese labor camp until her debt to society is paid off. It is a grave injustice and a terribly inconvenient tragedy, as it leaves us with only one active recipient for our charity.As you’re all well aware, we here at the Organization feel that we are not simply giving to individuals in need, but playing only a small part in a much greater cause: the betterment of mankind as a whole, and from there, the extinguishment of all fear and suffering in this world, everywhere, for all time, period, no take backs. This helps keep our billionaire socialite lifestyles the way we like them: rationalized!
But having only one person to carry the entirety of our world-changing generosity makes it hard not to notice how little we’ve actually accomplished. While remaining aid recipient Chogyal Jamyang may be a daily inspiration to all who know her, her abundant kindness and profound inner harmony are not enough to keep the truth of our depraved existences from finding us in the depths of our early morning cocaine rage.
So, with a spirit of love, acceptance and desperation, we are proud to announce an event unprecedented in Organization history!For the next several weeks, we will widen the search for our next aid recipient by suspending all of our reversible admission requirements! If you don’t fit the bill, don’t worry! Apply anyway!
Not wheelchair bound? Not a problem!
Sharing a home with a husband or significant other? Not for long!
Don’t have a child? Don’t have a cow!
Don’t have a blind child? We’ll…we’ll take care of that, too.
Even if you only fit a few of our categories, go ahead and apply now and we will work with you to meet the necessary requirements once you’ve been accepted into the OGFWBTSMBKP family!So sign up! Spread the word! And most importantly, friends: Spread the love!
Continue to give, continue to dream.
Namaste
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